Writing job application materials in pursuit of an academic position is a jarring combination of (a) massive waves of imposter syndrome and (b) awkward parsing of how awesome you are.
Example (a) mindset: “Who am I even kidding, I’m not competitive and have nothing to show.”
Example (b) mindset: “If I got some money with an honor that I didn’t specifically apply for, but that was applied to my PhD tuition, does it fall under the ‘Award’ category or the ‘Fellowship’ category?” See also: “There’s no way I can make my CV fit on three pages, and I’ve cut out all the random crap already.”
In other news, I cut off all* my hair, and am trying to figure out if it looks amazing or if I just think it looks amazing because it looks exactly how I wanted it to look. These are objectively different things, but I’m hoping they intersect at least a little. Feedback has been positive so far, including a “that makes you look much more professional” and a “look at your wild and crazy mane, that’s glorious”.
* stated literally, half of my hair. I am not bald. The average length per strand has decreased by a factor of 2 at minimum. It once was long where now it is not.