2 is also a lonely number

Beta dropped to 2, an official negative.  I am released from purgatory, and no longer required to play pin cushion in my early mornings.

This is good.  Pea texted “yay, I am glad!” at the news.  My nurse was pleased.  

I am pleased on one level and quite unhappy on another.  It’s not like I wanted this situation to continue, this is exactly the result I wanted today. But. But, I did at one point think my reality had shifted, that I was freed of the thermometer and the clinic, moving on to new landscapes.  To be back now, officially, to where I did not want to be in the first place is not uniformly positive in my mind.  I am not very upset, but I am also not particularly glad if I take the sum of my emotions.

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