A newspaper headline today reads ‘Jeb Bush sends 2016 signals’. It’s still 2014, and I’ve been watching West Wing obsessively lately, and all I can say is the last year (now more like two!) of a second administration is an uphill slog for it not to just be a wash. I think the US needs to reign in its campaign rules (on so any levels, but on length of campaign specifically today).
I am just back from the clinic. I had a phone conversation with my doctor yesterday which was perfect: she is on board with more letrozole cycles (strongly encouraged it, in fact, before I could break in and say that was our plan). For this month, I had figured we’d just wait and see if I ovulated, and plan a provera course when I inevitably didn’t. My doctor had other plans, and asked me to come in for a baseline ultrasound. Her plan was if nothing was going on to just jump in on cd13 with letrozole and get this ball rolling.
I will admit this plan caught me by surprise, but it was reasonable and efficient, which are traits I like in a plan. It wasn’t until I caught the bus to get to the clinic this morning that I realized I might not be ready. I’m ready to try again, but I’m not ready to be at the clinic. I gathered my gumption and carried on.
The past few days I’ve felt like I’m gearing up to ovulate. I mentioned it to Pea, and he smiled, the unsaid ‘I’ve heard this before’ shared in the grin I shot back. For once, friends, I am not crazy or wishing signs into being. The ultrasound showed a developing lining (7.5 mm) and a dominant follicle on my left ovary of 14 mm, so I should ovulate within the week!
Here’s an undigested list of how I feel about this. Warning, this list is full of feeeeeelings.
– I am ovulating on my very own!!!!! This has not happened since March 2013. No jokes, this is pretty unexpected.
– Pea just left on a ten day business trip this morning. So this egg has to hurry up if it wants last night’s festivities to be in contention.
– this means no weird half-way-through-cycle drug start, and no first-cycle-back-from-a-stalled-cycle disregulation. It means we’d start at the clinic on a clean balanced day 1. This makes me very happy.
– I get a break from the clinic
– probably this month is a wash, which seems like a waste of my very own egg, but maybe good given how despairing I felt getting on that bus this morning.
So it is opks through the weekend because I like data, and will need to know if I should progesterone support this LP. I figure anything within 4 days of sex and I’ll use the progesterone, anything longer and I’ll just see what my unmedicated LP looks like (maybe it too has improved?).
I think there is no sense in deciding this is now my new normal. I think I must plan to continue with the clinic, because the agony of waiting for an ovulation that is just. never. coming. is not one I care to revisit. Callously, it’s not that expensive to get 3 eggs to try for instead of one by adding letrozole to the mix, and I am tired of waiting.